 In the summer of 2019 I made a big mistake: I didn't take a proper vacation and I didn't take one for most of that year. I know this is not the type of mistake that would have the Law Society knocking on my door, but this seemingly small misstep had massive repercussions – a rippling negative effect - on my job, practice, and life, that lasted a lot longer than the summer. It can sometimes be easy for lawyers and business owners to prioritize work over their personal life, but when we do that, not only does our personal life suffer, but so does our work. And when our work suffers, our personal life suffers. It can become a vicious cycle. So how can we make sure to guard our vacation time without having to sacrifice our practices and businesses? Fast forward to the present and I have implemented 5 lessons I learned from the summer of 2019 (described below) and found an approach that works for me. How I Messed Up in 2019I had the best of intentions to unplug that summer. I planned on working extra long days on Monday to Thursday so I could take Fridays off in July and August and enjoy the warm weather. Instead, I found myself saying, “Sure I can schedule that call/meeting on Friday, no problem”. Or, thinking to myself, “I’ll just pop into the office Friday morning and take the afternoon off”, only to look up and see that it was 6pm. No worries, I thought at the time, there’s plenty of summer left. In July we loaded our three kids into the car and drove to remote Maine for a planned seven-day long vacation. On our arrival, I found it so peaceful.....until some work emails started coming in (at the time I was the sole employee at Flex Legal managing all of the freelance lawyers and lawyer clients). And, of course, something was up. There was a miscommunication between a lawyer client and a freelance lawyer. Both were looking to me to assist. By the time the issue was resolved it was three days into my vacation. On the seventh day I was finally starting to unwind, and . . . it was time to go home. But, no worries, I remember thinking, there was still plenty of summer left, it was only August. On my return to the office I did not feel relaxed. I did not feel rejuvenated. I felt lethargic. I would go to the office with a long to-do list and I would barely get through a few items. Normally I am energised to get to the office in the morning, but 8 hours would go by and I wondered, what did I do all day? Anything? Instead of recognizing that I needed a break, I pushed through, I stayed at my computer all day, everyday. I didn’t get anything done. I told myself, how could I justify taking a day, or days off, now that I am barely doing any work?! And then August was over. September abruptly arrived, which was my busiest time of year. There is always an uptick in business for Flex in the fall and I was teaching at the University of Toronto. My calendar was full of conferences, networking events, volunteer meetings. My window of opportunity to take a proper break closed. By not taking the vacation my work suffered because I had no energy left to give. Does this sound familiar?  Take a (Real) Vacation, it will Make You a Better Lawyer!I’m not giving you any earth-shattering information. We all know that taking a real vacation makes us less stressed, more focused, and in return, better lawyers, better employees, and better bosses. Even though I love my job, I still need a break from it. I need to unplug and unwind. I need to think about something other than the law. When I do, I return to work with more energy and commitment. When I worked for someone else, I always took all my allotted vacation. I felt I was working hard and I rightly deserved the time off. Now that I have my own practice and business and can, in theory, take as much vacation time that I want, I take even less. I needed to change that. What Went Wrong in 2019?First, it was my plan to take Fridays off. I was putting too much pressure on myself. When I inevitably had to work on a Friday, I felt disappointed in myself and the negative thoughts would creep in, “Erin, look at you, another Friday where you worked when you said you wouldn’t.” Which in turn would make me lose focus and become very unproductive. I knew something had to change. I still wanted to take more time off during the summer, but I needed to find an approach that worked for me. So in the summer of 2023, I decided to take time off when the opportunity presented itself. Let me explain. I am an early morning riser and I do my best work in between 6am-11am. I would still work Monday to Friday during that time (or would let myself sleep in a few days if I felt my body needed the rest). But, when 1pm or 2pm rolled around and I didn’t have any more phone calls I would just end my workday. My to-do list wasn’t done (it never is!) but if the most important things for that day were completed, I gave myself permission to enjoy the remainder of the day, whether that was hanging out with one of my kids, reading a book on the porch, or going for a walk. Some days I worked full days, some days half days, and some days not at all. I also removed work email from my phone while I was away on my week long cottage vacation and left my laptop at home (I recognize not everyone can do this, but if you can I highly recommend it). And I protected my calendar better in 2023. I did not take as many meetings as I did in the summer of 2019. Many of the “pick your brain” or “let’s catch up” coffee meetings can wait until September, so I said yes only to the meetings that could help with Flex Legal’s sales or were required to keep the business running properly. Does this approach work for everyone? Maybe not. But the important thing is to find an approach that works for you that gives you a break from your job. Remember: Taking time off makes us better, not weaker. The 5 Lessons I Learned:So, here are the lessons I learned (which may help ensure that you take your important vacation time):
NUMBER ONE: Figure Out What Works for You. Pick what type of time off / vacation works for you and your practice. Is it winding down in the summer (or winter) and only working a few days? Is it taking a few weeks away from the office every January? Is it working half days? Is it a mixture of both, a few weeks away in the winter and some half days in June? Make plans that are easy for you to commit to with your schedule. NUMBER TWO: Block Your Calendar in Advance. Book the vacation time into your calendar in advance. Not nailing down the time off makes it easier to push back that much needed break. Block off next year's vacation time when you return from the current year's vacation. NUMBER THREE: If it Works for You, Take More Than One Week Try to take at least two weeks off in a row each year if you can. For me, one week is not enough to get the “law” out of my system and to unwind. (In the early 1970s, law partners at larger firms in Toronto used to take one month off each summer, plus another two weeks in the winter to ski or take a sunny vacation south. Small firm lawyers would take Fridays off. ) NUMBER FOUR: Plan Financially Planning for a break in income is especially important for those who are sole owners. If we don’t work, we don’t get paid. Factor your vacation time into your financial plan for the year. (In other words, don’t let money be an excuse to not take time off). NUMBER FIVE: Take a REAL Break & Fiercely Protect Your Time Take a TRUE break from work and do NOT work on your vacation. I know this is hard if you are a sole practitioner, but try to have someone cover your practice if an emergency comes up. Or, simply shut down your practice for those weeks. I know this sounds scary but if you give enough notice to your clients it often is not a big issue (send them emails in advance, put the dates you will be away in your email signature at least a month prior, have a detailed out of office message set on your website, email and phone etc.). Or, if you are more anxious not checking in on work every day, then set aside a specific time each day to look at email. Don't have it easily accessible on your phone. You don't want to see each and every email that comes in when you are trying to relax. Also, fiercely protect our time. Practice saying “No”. Say “No” to that meeting they want to schedule on your day off. Say “No” to that “quick” conference call while you are on vacation. And then provide an alternative date for when you are back in the office, relaxed and ready to work! The bottom line: We need to give ourselves permission to take a break and forget about law for a while. We will be better lawyers if we do. Don’t make the same mistake I did. (This post was originally published in 2019, updated June 2024.) Photo by chen zo on Unsplash
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As an avid reader I always have at least two books on the go: one that is fiction (most often a murder mystery or detective novel), and one that is non-fiction, usually a business book or biography / memoir by a businessperson. I have always been eager to find recommendations for good business-related books. Some lists have been great and have included honest reviews with a variety of interesting or helpful books. Other times I have been duped by lists that are clearly biased or paid reviews. Since the number of books that I have read keeps growing, I’ve decided to make my own list and write some reviews & recommendations to help others find their next great read. I’ve developed my own rating system for these books:
Keep in mind that I have an undergraduate degree in English Literature and no formal business training, so some of these books may be very basic for those with a business degree. Also, I fully admit that the majority of these books are written by men (19 of the 25) and I am not happy about that. Adrienne Dorison recently posted on LinkedIn a list of business books authored by women. Many of those are on my to-read list now! I have loosely separated out the books into three categories (although some books can fit into one or more category): 1) business improvement books; 2) autobiographies/biographies or memoirs by business owners or entrepreneurs; and 3) leadership / career advice books. (If you don't want to read the full blog post with my reviews and recommendations and just want the list with links to the books, you can find that here.)
1) Traction: Get a Grip on Your Business by Gino Wickman Rating: 5 This book sits on a table in my office, always in reach, especially during our quarterly and annual planning meetings. In it Wickman sets out a simple framework (which he calls the Entrepreneurial Operating System or EOS) for how to run your business. At Flex Legal, we have implemented many of the recommendations in this book but have put our own twists on them. Traction is one book of many in the EOS/ Traction library and the EOS world, which also includes EOS podcasts and EOS coaches (implementers) you can hire. I’m very much a DIY’er so I never felt the need to hire an EOS coach and have implemented the suggestions in the book myself. 2) The EOS Life by Gino Wickman Rating: 2 This is another book in the Traction library. I gave this book a lower rating because I felt like it could have been a blog post. It was an easy read, but I’m disappointed I spent money on it. It boils down to the five points of the EOS Life: doing what you love, with people you love, making a huge difference, being compensated appropriately, with time for other passions. 3) The Pumpkin Plan: A Simple Strategy to Grow a Remarkable Business in Any Field by Mike Michalowicz Rating: 4 This book was my first introduction to Mike Michalowicz. Michalowicz writes business books for small business owners who likely do not have business degrees. Some people may find his writing off-putting (it is rather cringey in some places), but I recommend that you try to overlook the goofiness and focus on the messaging. This book is not about growing pumpkins (ha!) but about growing a business by focusing on the few big pumpkins (great clients) in your pumpkin patch and weeding/pruning away the other pumpkins (bad clients) that are taking resources (your time, energy) away from the best. He gives some good tips on how to find your dream clients and fire your nightmare ones. 4) Clockwork (Design Your Business to Run Itself) by Mike Michalowicz Rating: 5 This book sits next to my Traction book. At Flex Legal we combine lessons from Clockwork and Traction to make sure our business is running like clockwork and gaining traction (see what I did there?). Michalowicz’s goal is to help business owners take a 4-week vacation by having their business run itself (so, having the right people, processes, and systems in place). The book also helps business owners determine and focus on the “Queen Bee Role” of the business, in other words the critical role for your business, without which your business will collapse. I have an older version of this book and I understand that there is a newer and updated version now available. 5) Fix This Next by Mike Michalowicz Rating: 2 I gave it a 2 because I never actually finished reading it. I’m not sure why, I think I just got bored? It appears to be a business version of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. If I do finish it, I will be sure to update this review. 6) The E-Myth Revisited by Michael Gerber Rating: 4.5 Another book I would put with Traction and Clockwork with similar messaging and advice. I have also read this one at least twice. The “E-myth” stands for the “Entrepreneurial Myth” and is aimed at people who start small businesses who haven’t yet embraced the entrepreneurial mindset. This book helps you to think more like an entrepreneur and take steps to have your business run without you. A lot of the tips stem from the saying “work on your business and not in it”. 7) Building A Story Brand: Clarify Your Message So Customers Will Listen by Donald Miller Rating: 5 This book makes branding and marketing concepts accessible to non-branding and non-marketing people. If you are looking to refresh your messaging on your website or in your email marketing campaigns, this is a good book for you. Miller describes the 7 elements of great storytelling and how to use them to grow your business. 8) Business Made Simple by Donald Miller Rating: 3 Maybe it’s because I read many “business made simple” type books before I picked this one up, but I did not find this one as helpful as Traction, Clockwork, etc. However, if you have not read the other ones, this might be a good one to start with. Donald Miller breaks down running a business into bite-size (read one-a-day) tips and actions for small business owners. 9) The Dip: A Little Book That Teaches Your When to Quit (and When to Stick) by Seth Godin Rating: 2 I picked up this book a few years into running Flex Legal as a solopreneur. It was at a time when I was trying to decide whether to stick with Flex Legal or bail. According to Seth Godin I was either facing a “Dip” or a “Cul-de-Sac”. The Dip being a temporary setback that you can overcome if you keep pushing (so don’t quit when the going gets tough, push through it). Supposedly successful people don’t just ride out the dip, they lean into it. The Cul-de-Sac is a place you can be in that will never get better, no matter how hard you try. Good premise, but the book fails to teach you how to really recognize if you are in a Dip or a Cul-de-Sac. In hindsight, I was in a Dip, but I had no idea, and this book did not help. 10) Company of One: Why Staying Small is the Next Big Thing for Business by Paul Jarvis Rating: 3 I also read this book when I was still a solopreneur and I think I wanted some reassurance that it was okay to keep my business small. The premise of this book is that not everyone has to start a business that needs to scale up as soon as possible and that some business owners are quite successful at committing to a better business instead of a bigger one. Jarvis focuses on a minimalist business strategy. However, some businesses just grow or need to grow in order stay successful. I probably waited too long to bring on employees and grow the management side of my business after reading this book. 11) Think. Do. Say. by Ron Tite Rating: 3 Ron Tite is an advertising creative director, and he writes about an approach to cutting through the advertising noise as a business owner. That approach is boiled down to Think.Do.Say. The premise being: be authentic. I found it to be an easy fun read with a couple of little nuggets for me to take away. Probably could have been a blog post. I would pair this book and read it with Story Brand by Donald Miller.
12) After Steve: How Apple Became a Trillion Dollar Company and Lost its Soul by Tripp Mickle Rating: 4.5 While this technically isn't a biography of one person, this book does a deep dive into Apple after Steve Jobs’ death, and in particular, follows the careers of Tim Cook the COO turned CEO and Jony Ive the Chief Design Officer. The author is a good storyteller, weaving anecdotes and painting a picture of the building tension between these two men and their visions for the company. After reading the book, it is clear that Apple is no longer the same company it once was, and it was fascinating to see the shift in culture that happened. 13) Shoe Dog: A Memoir by the Creator of Nike by Phil Knight Rating: 5 I really liked this book. While this was clearly a privileged white man who started out on second base in his journey to build a massive business, it was an entertaining and interesting read. This book follows the wild and stressful journey of Phil Knight in building Nike and the ridiculous and crazy events that happened on the way, along with some not-so-great choices and actions that he took as a leader. This book not only made me feel better about my business but made me think I needed to take a few more risks in life. 14) The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life by Alice Schroeder Rating: 4 Many, many times throughout reading this book I would turn to my husband and say, “Warren Buffet sounds like an a-hole.” My biggest beef with the man (not the book, which was fascinating) was that he collects women like objects. He collects them for different needs in his life and truly believes that the women’s fulfillment in life comes from caring for him. Now to be fair, he did have a traumatic childhood with an abusive mother, so the source of this need to have women care for him is obvious. It still doesn’t make it right. Putting this aspect of Warren Buffett aside, the business parts of the book are fascinating. Highlighted throughout is Buffett’s need to collect things from stamps to women to obviously money and companies, and the razor-sharp focus he has on building his wealth and making smart choices. I enjoyed reading all the inside information on the many business deals and the decision process he undertook to make those deals. At 960 pages (!) the author gives a very detailed account, almost too detailed account on every aspect of Buffett (and his wife Susie’s) life (and I read the updated and shortened version!) 15) The Ride of a Lifetime: Lessons Learned from 15 Years as CEO of the Walt Disney Company by Robert Iger Rating: 5 This book chronicles Robert Iger’s role as CEO, the decisions he made, and the setbacks he faced. Iger describes the principles that he feels are necessary for true leadership: optimism, courage, focus, decisiveness, curiosity, fairness, thoughtfulness, and integrity. The book starts with Iger learning about the little boy who was killed by an alligator at the Disney World in Florida and then flashes back to follow Iger’s career leading up to be becoming CEO. Once again this is a great “behind the scenes” look at a large company and the human component (emotions and egos) that can make or break a business. The appendix has a long list of “lessons to lead by” which are helpfully collected in one place. 16) Untamed by Glennon Doyle Rating: 1 I know I am an outlier on this one, so please bear with me. It’s hard for me to describe, but I have major distrust over this book and find it lacks authenticity (*ducks and hides*). In this book, the author mentions two previous books she had written about her life which she now admits weren’t honest depictions of her life at the time, but Untamed is now the real honest truth. What am I to believe? (Also, I don’t know why, but the fact that she is a grown woman, with kids and running her own business, and didn’t know how to buy a plane ticket really bothered me – was this really true? It also made me question the entire book for some reason). Many, many, people found this book empowering. I did not. 17) No Bootstraps When You’re Barefoot by Wes Hall Rating: 4 This book was an inspiring read and chronicles the life and career of a Canadian business leader and founder of the Black North Initiative, Wes Hall. This is a true “I started with nothing” book (unlike other “I started with nothing but a small $200,000 loan from my parents” type of story). Wes recounts overcoming his lack of money and education as well as facing systemic racism to become the successful businessperson he is today. Bonus: if you are intrigued about proxy solicitation the second half of the book is fascinating.
18) Permission to Screw Up: How I Learned to Lead by Doing (Almost) Everything Wrong by Kristen Hadeed
Rating: 5 I loved the honesty in this book. It follows Kristen Hadeed’s unintentional launch of a business called Student Maid, because she wanted to buy a pair of jeans she couldn’t afford as a university student. The author sets out everything she did wrong (and how she fixed it) as a leader, and new business owner. I borrowed this book from the library, and I wish I had my own copy to re-read. I may have enjoyed this book so much because I read this book when I was still a new-ish business owner. It gives such an unvarnished look at entrepreneurship that it made me feel so much better about my own mistakes. It was a breath a fresh air. 19) The Genius Habit by Laura Garnett Rating: 3.5 This book talks about the importance of knowing what you are good at and what brings you joy and focusing on this information to find a successful and fulfilling career. Basically, Laura Garnett gives you tips on how to become more self-aware and figure out what you really want in life. I read this book back when I had started practicing as a freelance lawyer and I was already enjoying my career. I felt like I had already found my “Zone of Genius” as she called it so I didn’t find it very helpful, but I did loan it (I guess the proper term is “gift” as it was never returned) to a friend who was struggling with finding fulfillment in her career. 20) The Coaching Habit (Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever) by Michael Bungay Stanier Rating: 4 Anyone who manages other people would benefit from reading this book. It is a short read with bit-sized tips on how to ask the right (seven) questions when approached by members of your team (or others) seeking your advice or help. It encourages more asking questions and less telling people what to do. I recommend this book for people with businesses who want to be doing less and delegating more. This book helps you to stop and understand before jumping in and trying to fix or do everything yourself. 21) The Productivity Project: Accomplishing More by Managing Your Time, Attention and Energy by Chris Bailey Rating: 4 This felt like it was written by a single person with no one else depending on them. Chris Bailey spent a year performing a deep-dive into studying productivity and conducting productivity experiments, the results of which are this book. There are many different takes on how to improve your productivity and some actually worked for me. Others, I very much reacted with a “Hell, no!” to (like the “give up or reduce coffee intake” advice). I would recommend this for someone who wants to dig deeper into what it means to be productive and to find ways to bring better productivity into their lives. 22) How to Calm Your Mind: Finding Presence and Productivity in Anxious Times by Chris Bailey Rating: 5 Turns out focusing only on being very productive may not be the best thing for your mental health. This book was written after The Productivity Project and after Chris Bailey had become stressed and burnt out and started suffering from panic attacks. This book was one of the impetuses behind some of the real changes I made in my life to look after my mental health better and to find more “calm”. While some critics argue that Bailey isn’t writing about anything new, I found it helpful and new to me or at least a good reminder of advice I already knew but didn’t put into practice. I particularly enjoyed the chapters on stimulation fasting and choosing analog; my morning routine has changed because of this book. 23) Daring Greatly by Brene Brown Rating: 1 Another one where I am an outlier. This time it was the writing for me. I found it very frustrating. According to the book description, Dr. Brown discusses how to “embrace vulnerability and imperfection, to live wholeheartedly, and to courageously engage in our lives.” However, I found that it included a lot of generalities and I need concrete examples, steps, and to-dos. At the end of the book, I was asking myself: “What the heck IS vulnerability?” “What was this book about?” “What am I supposed to take away from this?” I literally tossed the book in frustration across the room when I was finished. The book does have a 4.29 out of 5 rating on Goodreads, so I am very much in the minority. 24) The Anxious Achiever: Turn Your Biggest Fears Into Your Leadership Superpower by Morra Aarons-Mele Rating: 4 According to the dust-jacket description this is a book with a mission: “to normalize anxiety and leadership.” Aarons-Mele tackles reframing anxiety, helping leaders understand and avoid common thought traps and triggers, and resisting perfectionism among other tips. I found the anecdotes and shared experiences helpful as well as the various exercises spread throughout the book to put the tips into practice. If you are into podcasts the author hosts “The Anxious Achiever” podcast. 25) Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World by David Epstein Rating: 3 I am not sure if I finished this book. I found it to be a bit of a slow read. It was a few years ago and I remember learning a few nuggets of wisdom from it though. The book encourages us to think broadly and embrace diverse experiences and perspectives to thrive in life. As someone who has had numerous jobs and career paths, I do remember feeling reassured after reading this book ( or at least a part of it). Currently Reading: Radical Candor by Kim Scott and Barbarians at the Gate: The Fall of RJR Nabisco by Bryan Burrough & John Helyar. I will add my reviews/ratings when I am finished! Good leaders build you up, they don’t tear you down.
Lately, I’ve been talking a lot with others about what makes a great leader and it has reminded me of an experience I had as a first-year associate. At the end of the last day of a long trial, the senior partner turned to our trial team of five, and said, “Leave the boxes.” (This was when we brought physical copies of documents to court in dozens of bankers boxes.) “Erin will pack everything up and bring them back to the office.” This was puzzling. Every day prior, as was the norm at this firm, we had packed up as a team, all pitching in from law clerk to partner. When the articling student offered to stay and help me, the senior partner bluntly cut her off, “No. Erin will do this herself.” He then put on his coat and refused to make eye contact with me. The discussion was over. The others stood around awkwardly, not sure what to say or do, before finally putting their coats on too - end of trial drinks were waiting. As they were leaving, the junior partner looked at me and said: “You look like your dog just died.” I tried to laugh it off as my eyes filled with tears. Because that was exactly how I felt: crushed. And embarrassed. Humiliated. Ashamed. As I remained behind, alone, packing the boxes, trying to hold back tears, I knew I had obviously messed up and was being punished for it. This partner was putting me in my place. But…the kicker was… I didn’t know what I had done wrong! I worked hard, showed up early, did everything asked of me. I was perplexed. Did I miss a case in my research? Did I embarrass him in some way? I went over everything in my mind and when I came up with nothing, I felt even worse. I couldn’t figure it out. I was too stupid to even know what mistake I had made. The thing is, this could have been a good learning experience. The partner could have talked to me about how I messed up or provided guidance on how I could improve as a junior lawyer. I would have appreciated that, no matter how awkward the conversation might have been. Instead, this partner chose to teach me a lesson by making me feel small. I knew then that if I ever was fortunate enough to lead a team, I would not be like this partner. I would try to lift people up, not put them down. I would empower my team, not belittle them. I would give feedback to help them grow, not punish them for their mistakes. So, I guess this partner did teach me a very valuable lesson after all, although perhaps not the one he intended.  When I was around eight or nine years old, I was riding my 1980s “Blue Angel” bicycle on a rocky trail near my home in the country. Going down a steep hill, my feet slipped off the pedals and I lost control of my bike. I could not back-pedal to brake. Hurtling down at a high speed, my front wheel hit a large rock and I flew high over the handlebars, landing headfirst on the gravel and dirt (no helmet of course, it was the 80s). My father, who was behind me and witnessed my crash, probably thought I was dead. I’ve never seen him so upset, with tears in his eyes as he picked me up and held me, my face bloody from the impact.
In the following weeks, as my cuts and bruises healed, I was too afraid to get back on that bike. I left it in the garage, avoiding it. Then those weeks turned into months and those months into years. I grew accustomed to the idea of never getting on a bicycle again. And to this day I haven’t. Fast-forward to March of 2020. When the pandemic hit, it was a scary time. Like most people, I was worried for the health of my loved ones, but also, I was concerned about the uncertainty surrounding the length of the lock-down, the effect it would have on my young children, and the economic impact on my business and law practice. But a part of me, the introvert part of me, finally felt at ease. Being forced to stay home, was, in fact, liberating. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy being social and interacting with other human beings. Like most introverts, though, social gatherings drain me, and I have to “psych” myself up and put on my “extrovert” face before I go out. Then, after the event, dinner, or party, I need to be alone to recharge my batteries before I do it all again. It can be exhausting. Pre-pandemic, I would attend several client meetings, business coffees, and networking events during the week and several personal social events on the weekends. In the first few weeks of the pandemic, when these events were cancelled (or moved online), I was in heaven. For the first time in what felt like forever I didn’t have to leave my house! It was amazing. But then those weeks turned into months, and the months turned into years of being able to avoid social gatherings without judgement. And just like I grew comfortable with the idea of never riding a bike again, I have grown comfortable with the idea of never leaving my house again. This is not good. Introverts may dread social situations, but as human beings, we need them. While avoiding in-person social gatherings has given me short-term relief, it also seems to have reinforced my discomfort and trepidation. I feel like this prolonged avoidance has made things harder for me to return to a “normal” life. Fortunately, unlike the little girl avoiding her bike, I have every intention of attending social gatherings again. But, as I return, I will do so at my own pace (one step is publishing this blog post, as I re-emerge into the online social world, something else I have been avoiding since I paused my blog in 2021). It was only a few weeks ago that I had my first in-person business coffee since March of 2020. I left the meeting feeling energized (how I imagine extroverts feel when they leave parties) confirming for me that while I may think that I would prefer to hide at home forever, I need to get back out there. Slowly. I will dip my toes in and get used to the water. No headfirst dives for me. Luckily, I have my own business, so no one is mandating that I return to the office full-time. I hope law firms or legal departments that have asked their employees to return in-person are being mindful of this adjustment period for some of us. And it’s not just returning to the office, it’s returning to in-person client meetings, CPD events, and court appearances, too. While Zoom court has its downsides, I am sure many anxious lawyers enjoyed not having to worry about finding the robing rooms, or courtroom number, or arriving late, or remembering what table to sit at, etc. Those of you who are extroverts, or even ambiverts, may not be able to relate to anything that I’ve written. You may be like many people I know who have been eager to re-enter the world and have been attending in-person events for some time. I’m writing this post to remind people that as the world is re-opening (or has already re-opened for many of you) there may be a steep readjustment period for some of us. To those of you reading this who are dreading returning to the office, remember that it is good for us to leave our house and get back out there. However, be kind to yourself – take breaks from the busy office, take some alone time at lunch, maybe ask for a hybrid working model, etc. It may be hard at first, but it will get better. As for me, as I summon the courage to start attending more in-person social gatherings, maybe this summer, 35 years later, I will finally find the strength to borrow someone’s bicycle and truly test the old saying, “It’s like riding a bike.”  I tend to give (mostly solicited, sometimes unsolicited) advice to other lawyers on how to deal with the stresses and challenges of working in the legal profession. Some of that advice has been (in no particular order):
The thing that has not been working for me is this blog. Once a joy and an outlet for my stress, something I looked forward to writing each month, has now become a bit of a chore, that dreaded item that falls to the bottom of my To-Do list, causing me grief. I’m not exactly sure why I feel this way now. I could chalk it up to any number of reasons. It could be because this pandemic has wreaked an emotional toll on me, with working from home, kids in online school, not seeing family and friends… It could also be that my freelance lawyer & law clerk business, Flex Legal, has grown significantly in the last six months - which is great, don’t get me wrong - but it is taking up all my time and energy. I probably should have stopped writing months ago, but I am not “a quitter”. I’ve always placed great importance on being someone who follows through on a commitment. I want others to know my word is good, you can trust that I will do what I say I will do. It’s one of my top values in life. But this value can also be my downfall. I once stayed in a job that was causing me severe mental stress because I was not a “quitter”. In my younger days, I stayed in relationships I knew were not right because I was not a “quitter”. And, I stayed writing this blog because I promised myself, I would write at least one blog post a month, and I always follow through on a promise. And I have. I started this blog back in 2014 when I was unemployed after spending 7 years at one firm and 7 months at another. I was at a crossroads in my career. That is when I decided I would give “freelance lawyering” a shot. I did some research and designed my own website for this new freelance practice and read somewhere that a good way to get traffic to your site was to have a blog. So, I thought, why not? My first post was called: “Is Legal Ghostwriting Unethical?” Since that time, I have written one or two blog posts a month, including posts on case comments, book reviews, summaries of legal events, EDI issues, legal career advice - basically anything and everything related to being a lawyer or law. I also started a successful blog series on Women Leading in the Law, when I was tired of reading about women leaving law, and wanted to read about women leading in law instead. I could never really anticipate which posts would be popular, I just wrote about things that interested me. Surprisingly (or not), my most read blog post, with over 10,000 unique page views is: “What are a Lawyer’s Professional Obligations When Leaving a Law Firm?” It has been a fun seven (!) years, from when my mom was the only one reading this blog to winning the top CLAWBIE award (the “Fodden Award for Best Canadian Law Blog”) in 2017, to being contacted by the CBC to use my “influence” (ha!) as a blogger to share news about a CBC radio documentary on Justice LeDain, and being mentioned in an article in a national newspaper. I have learned a lot about myself, other lawyers, and the legal profession through writing this blog, but I keep hearing the words in my head from one of my favorite childhood books by Dr. Seuss … “The time has come, the time is now, … ‘Erin C. Cowling’ will you please go now?!” The time has indeed come, and the time is now, to say goodbye (or at least press the pause button) on this blog. Before I sign off, I want to say thank you. Thank you to my mom for being the first to read these posts. Thank you to everyone who has signed up for my emails and read and commented on my posts (even you trolls, you know who you are). Thank you to everyone who has emailed me directly when something I have written has struck a nerve. Thank you to the 74 amazing women who took the time to answer my questions for the Women Leading in Law series. This was a huge accomplishment and I’m glad it brought a spotlight to so many talented women lawyers across Canada. Keep up the great work. And thank you to you for reading this and making me feel like I am not alone in this crazy and amazing profession. Farewell! I may be saying goodbye to this blog, but I am not going anywhere. You can read more about freelance lawyering and other insights about the legal profession over at our Flex Legal blog. You can also always reach me at [email protected] or [email protected] , or on Twitter @Cowlingerin & @Flexlegalnet and on LinkedIn  Welcome back to the Women Leading in Law blog series. Today's post features Maneesha Gupta, an IP lawyer and the founder of Mindful Lawyer Canada, Canada's premier mindfulness community for legal professionals. I think at this point in the pandemic we could all use a little more mindfulness in our lives. Read on to learn more about Maneesha's journey and success in law: 1. Tell me a little about your practice or business. I am an Intellectual Property and Technology lawyer practicing in all aspects of IP, advertising, and technology law. I am currently working at TD Bank. I advise on cybersecurity, privacy, data protection, automation and risk management for AI adoption. I started Mindful Lawyer Canada to motivate people to lead inspired lives. The idea was born on Bay Street in 2018. I felt drained, powerless, defeated, and lost. Early on in my career, I also saw that a lot of things were broken in the way lawyers talked about self-care and mental health. I put my hobbies on the backburner and remember how hard it was to attend personal appointments due to limited time and a fluctuating work schedule. I had spent hours looking for an easy-to-access group of lawyers seeking wellness, personal development, and peer-to-peer solutions. Initially, my aim was to create a community meditation space for lawyers. MLC has since expanded beyond that to a suite of corporate wellness programs, weekly mindfulness sessions and events catered to any legal professional. Pursuing mindfulness with peers can be an incredible way to boost our energy, support our physical and mental health, and connect with others. For the law firms, proactive and scalable mindfulness and inclusion helps to retain talent, reduce lawyer burn-out, save money, and improve the health and productivity of employees. I remember within the first week with a post on it, someone contacted me to run a mindfulness event for hundreds of legal professionals. And then the second big tech event was booked, and how inspiring and encouraging that was. The pandemic has taught us that we need connection and community in our lives now more than ever. 2. Why did you go to law school? Unlike most people, I wanted a law degree as a stepping stone to the next chapter in my career. I have a long way to go. I come from a large family of established doctors and engineers, so it took a lot to convince them that this was going to be my path. I paid for everything myself in school and worked multiple jobs to make it all fit. At Osgoode Hall Law School, I loved the faculty, took part in a moot, and enjoyed my favourite course called Beyond Bay Street, which confirmed this was the right decision for me. 3. How did you get to where you are today? Design? Chance? Both? Mostly design. Despite all the science degrees around me, I gravitated towards becoming a lawyer. There was no inflection point – a career in law was my "calling" and I streamlined all my goals with that in mind. I am self-driven and proud to be a first generation lawyer. I also come from a close-knit and exceptionally hard-working family. My parents left India more than 50 years ago and from a young age, they instilled in us the importance of standing on your own two feet, honouring your roots, having integrity, and giving back. My parents and I share a strong bond - they are my closest friends, a huge part of who I am, and how I got to where I am. I am also inspired by other women leading in law. Eva Chan is a trailblazer who leads by example. Eva has taught me so much about being focused, authentic, intentional, purposeful, and supporting others. 4. What is your most significant achievement? What are you proud of? While there are many things I am proud of (running full marathons, being a dragon-boater, dance), nothing will beat the feeling of passing my bar exams and being called to the bar with my colleagues. All my dreams came true that day, and my sacrifices and hard work had paid off. 5. What are some key challenges, and more importantly, opportunities for women in law? We have a white-male driven legal profession with significant gender and racial challenges. Consequently, people of colour, persons of disability, women and other gender identities often repeatedly demonstrate their commitment and competence thereby feeling exhausted and demoralized. Earning a law degree in Canada is a privilege – a legal education gives you the opportunity to rise up, influence decision-making and create space for different races, backgrounds, and genders. Don’t waste your time being a passive bystander in your career. No matter what direction you decide to take, invest in your own growth and make it work for you. 6. What advice would you give a woman starting her legal career? Integrity, reputation, and ethics are paramount to your character and career – start and end with these values in mind. Don’t compare yourself to others. Don’t stay in jobs where you are living an inauthentic life. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Thank you Maneesha for taking the time to participate in this series and I look forward to seeing Mindful Lawyer Canada's continued success! I started this blog series because I was tired of hearing about women leaving law and wanted to hear about women leading in law. The "Women Leading in Law" series focuses on good news stories and highlights amazing women succeeding in the legal profession. Each post includes the profiled lawyer's answers to six questions. Prepare to be inspired! ICYMI - previous posts profiled the following amazing lawyers: Victoria Perrie, Amee Sandhu, Tanya Walker, Alysia Christiaen, Patricia Gamliel, Megan Cornell, Yola Ventrescu, Hilary Book, Margaret Waddell, Nandi Deterville, Jennifer Quaid, Maryann Besharat, Cynthia Mason, Roots Gadhia, Evelyn Ackah, Carrisa Tanzola, Sarah Leamon, Robin Parker, Lorin MacDonald, Karen Yamamoto, Victoria Crewe-Nelson, Lynne Vicars, Kemi Oduwole, Anne-Marie McElroy, Jennifer Gold, Jordana Goldlist, Megan Keenberg, Yadesha Satheaswaran, France Mahon, Sarah Molyneaux, Richa Sandill, Vivene Salmon, Kim Whaley, Alisia Grenville, Frances Wood, Maggie Wente, Anita Szigeti, Neha Chugh, Christy Allen & Nancy Houle, Suzie Seo, Kim Gale, Alexi Wood, Melissa McBain, Erin Best, Gillian Hnatiw, Melanie Sharman Rowand, Meg Chinelo Egbunonu, Lisa Jean Helps, Nathalie Godbout Q.C., Laurie Livingstone, Renatta Austin, Janis Criger, May Cheng, Nicole Chrolavicius, Charlene Theodore, Dyanoosh Youssefi, Shannon Salter, Bindu Cudjoe, Elliot Spears, Jessica Prince, Anu K. Sandhu, Claire Hatcher, Esi Codjoe, Kate Dewhirst, Jennifer Taylor, Rebecca Durcan, Atrisha Lewis, Vandana Sood, Kathryn Manning, Kim Hawkins, Kyla Lee, and Eva Chan.   Since the beginning of this blog in 2014, I’ve written at least one blog post per month. This has been a relatively easy goal to reach.
Until now. This month I started several posts only to get stuck in my own writing process. Which made me realize that I actually have a writing process. It’s not one that I strategically developed; it’s more like a process I fall into time and time again without any conscious effort. But in the end, it seems to work for me. So, I ditched the last draft I was writing and decided to write about the seven stages I proceed through every single time I write something. Almost like the seven stages of grief, every time I draft a blog post, factum, statement of claim, affidavit, or article for a publication, I inevitably go through the following: Stage 1: “Woohoo! I’m excited! I love writing!” I’m always excited and filled with anticipation when I start with a blank page. I feel the creative juices bubbling beneath the surface ready to move my fingers on the keyboard. I’m excited about the prospect of creating something from nothing and the potential for greatness. I’m excited to craft a winning argument to help a client win their case. I’m excited to tell a story in an affidavit. I’m excited to share my thoughts in a blog post or article. This is one of my favourite stages in my writing process. Stage 2: “I’m the worst writer ever and my client’s case is crap (or the idea for this article is crap).” And…. from the soaring heights of excitement, I come crashing down into the depths of despair. This usually happens after I start writing for a bit and put some words on the page. I then realize that perhaps the client’s case is not as great as I initially thought. Or, what I thought was the legal issue I was researching perhaps isn’t the one I should be focusing on. Or, the article idea now seems boring. I can’t seem to get my ideas straight. The paragraphs don’t flow. There is no organization. What I’ve written is an incoherent mess (or at least I think it is). Stage 3: “I’m back on track. I totally know what I need to do now!” Once I get the initial mess out on to the page and stare at it long enough, I reach a point where I can see through the mess and clarity emerges. [Cue image of clouds dispersing and sun shining through – this is the “aha!” moment] The structure and ideas all make sense. At this point I can really start writing. I get into a groove and the words start flowing again. Stage 4: Dun Dun Dun! …..The Dreaded Spin Cycle This stage of my writing process always sneaks up on me. I think I will make it through without visiting this stage, but inevitably it arrives. It’s the stage where I am sucked in so deep into the writing, I feel like I have fallen down a rabbit hole. Sometimes at this stage a factum has ballooned to 100 pages, or the legal opinion has 20 different possible outcomes to questions that weren’t even asked. This is the stage where I keep reading and writing and writing and reading and reading and writing…but I don’t feel like I have made any progress. I just sit there spinning around and around and not going anywhere, like a hamster on her wheel. This is the time that I must WALK AWAY. I normally leave the work and start another assignment or work on my invoices or some other task I need to do. I try to stay away for a day but if that is not possible, at least a few hours. Stage 5: “Phew. I have something done. Maybe it’s not horrible after all. I can work with this.” When I come back from the time away, I am usually pleasantly surprised with what I have written. There is enough there for me to work with, and now it is time to do a “big picture” edit or to cut and slash (saving the stuff I cut, obviously, because I will likely change my mind and want it back again). This is where I mold what I have into the first real draft of the final product. Stage 6: “Sweet. I like this. This is not bad, not bad at all.” As I work with the written product, I start to like it more and more. I get excited again. It’s turning into something that makes sense, is clear, cohesive and concise. I get excited about editing it and revising it and making it better and better with each draft. Stage 7: “I’m finished! It’s good. I’ve served it (or given it to the client or posted it on my website). It’s out into the world. Such relief…… Maybe I will read it one more time. …..NO! How did I not see that TYPO?” This happens too many times for me. Despite reading it over many times, out loud, and backwards, there is always that one typo I never see until it’s gone and out into the world. Sigh. But also, at this stage I feel a deep sense of pride about what I have written and accomplished. And then I start on my next project….. What’s your writing process? Is it as crazy as mine?  I am so happy to start the New Year with another wonderful profile in the Women Leading in Law series. Meet Victoria Perrie a criminal lawyer with Legal Aid Nunavut. The photo is of Victoria straddling the latitudinal line representing the Arctic Circle, at below -50 temperature, in Naujaat, Nunavut, while there for circuit court!
1. Tell me a little about your practice or business. I am a criminal lawyer with Legal Aid Nunavut. I work in Kangiqłiniq, or Rankin Inlet. We are a small office with three criminal lawyers, two family lawyers, and three court workers. Legal Aid Nunavut has a decentralized approach to service delivery, with offices and organizational leaders spread across the territory in Iqaluit, Kangigłiniq, Iqaluktuuttiaq, and Uqsuqtuuk. What is really special about working in Nunavut the opportunity to travel and constantly meet new people. The office I work at is the regional office for the entire Kivalliq region. Lawyers from my office represent clients in each of the seven communities in the Kivalliq. I travel at least once every three weeks for work – and I love it! There are four official languages of Nunavut. I regularly deliver legal services through an interpreter, and appear in court for hearings which will have consecutive interpretation. Cross-examination with interpretation is a skill you will learn, if you’re working in Nunavut! Learning to speak clearly and concisely is a must to ensure you are communicating with your client and interpreter effectively. Working on Inuit territory has given me the chance to explore the land, learn from elders and develop my litigation skills. From watching the northern lights dance in the sky, making long treks across the sea ice in the back of a qamutik, eating whale, seal, and polar bear, learning to prepare and harvest a caribou, to arguing in circuit courts, the Nunavut Court of Justice, and supporting public legal education – Nunavut really has a lot to offer for personal and professional development. 2. Why did you go to law school? I went to law school to learn colonial law and gain skills to be a better advocate. Throughout my pre-law life, I worked in a number of advocate service positions. I have worked for folks with diverse abilities, with many people living with FASD and ARND, those engaged in sex work, and kids in care. I wanted to learn to better use my voice to support the populations I had worked with, and to help others access justice. I thought a law degree would help me understand how to navigate systems and hone my advocacy skills. Becoming a lawyer taught me just that. Law school also taught me humility, courage, respect, and how to deal with the rollercoaster of stress and anxiety that comes with existing in a colonial institution. 3. How did you get to where you are today? Design? Chance? Both? I wouldn’t say I got to where I am today by chance or design, but rather by standing on the shoulders of giants who have come before me. Every ‘career’ decision has been made by following my heart. I have only worked on projects or took employment from places doing work that I believed in. If a firm or organization or project or person leading the work didn’t reflect my personal values or didn’t have a purpose I truly believed in, I wouldn’t engage and moved along. What has got me this far is going with my gut, not giving up, doing things I’m truly passionate about, being brave enough to fail, always trying new things, and sticking to my morals. 4. What is your most significant achievement? What are you proud of? I spent a lot of time thinking about this question and trying to decide what I would call my most significant achievement. The answer I’ve come up with is that it hasn’t happened yet. There are many things in my life that I am proud of: passing the bar, publishing papers, starting a theater school for Indigenous youth, speaking at conferences, working internationally, helping clients navigate colonial systems, my family and friends, but none of these individual experiences of pride can be chalked up as greater than another. For me, once a goal has been accomplished, I move on to the next, constantly changing my focus. Stay tuned for my most significant achievement. I can’t wait to find out what it is. My most recent experience of pride, was developing and teaching a for-credit law school course in Rankin Inlet. Working with several community partners, I was able to launch my Indigenous developed and delivered program as a for-credit high school course. This course discussed colonial law, Inuit law, and the differences and similarities between the two. Students learned from elders, community justice workers, and practicing lawyers. This class intended to culminate into a final moot presentation at the Nunavut Court of Justice to a room of Inuit justice participants. Unfortunately covid arrived in Nunavut in November 2020, putting an end to in-class instruction and school travel plans. I am now working to revamp this program and make it even better for delivery in fall 2021. 5. What are some key challenges, and more importantly, opportunities for women in law? White heteronormative patriarchy in colonial Canada is this huge umbrella of oppressive sludge which we all wade through to do our jobs. The “old boys club” of law still very much exists, even though some women are now allowed to sit at the table. Rules of ‘good character’ are set for members of the bar, making it difficult for some to access a legal career. For me, the most challenging notion is that I actively uphold and enforce the colonizers imposed laws, on land where laws have and continue to exist since time immemorial, by virtue of being a criminal lawyer. I think, within this challenge, lies opportunity. Opportunities to address situations of injustice in the court room, at the office, or on a conference call. The opportunity to be actively anti-racist and attempt to provide a trauma free experience for a client. The opportunity to be part of the change and working towards legal revolution where Indigenous opinions and legal frameworks are considered in all situations, by lawyers and judges, in policing, and by justices at all court levels. Each day is an opportunity to advance the concept that the Indigenous laws which exist on these lands need to be adhered to. 6. What advice would you give a woman starting her legal career? Trust your instincts and know yourself. I know after 3 or more years of law school, you’re probably exhausted. It is important to know what kind of person you are, or want to be. If you are uncomfortable with something, don’t do it. Don’t stay in a job or an internship or an article that kills your spirit: you WILL find something else. Don’t be afraid to speak up. Take up space and make your voice heard in the board room, the court room, and in your communities. Don’t do something because it would ‘look good’ on your resume. Do things that you love. If you haven’t already, think about your boundaries, and what they are. Don’t tolerate clients, colleagues or workplaces that cross those boundaries. Most importantly: listen to Myrna McCallum’s podcast: The Trauma-Informed Lawyer. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you Victoria for taking the time to participate in this series and we all look forward to hearing about your next great achievement, I am sure it will be amazing! I started this blog series because I was tired of hearing about women leaving law and wanted to hear about women leading in law. The "Women Leading in Law" series focuses on good news stories and highlights amazing women succeeding in the legal profession. Each post includes the profiled lawyer's answers to six questions. Prepare to be inspired! ICYMI - previous posts profiled the following amazing lawyers: Amee Sandhu, Tanya Walker, Alysia Christiaen, Patricia Gamliel, Megan Cornell, Yola Ventrescu, Hilary Book, Margaret Waddell, Nandi Deterville, Jennifer Quaid, Maryann Besharat, Cynthia Mason, Roots Gadhia, Evelyn Ackah, Carrisa Tanzola, Sarah Leamon, Robin Parker, Lorin MacDonald, Karen Yamamoto, Victoria Crewe-Nelson, Lynne Vicars, Kemi Oduwole, Anne-Marie McElroy, Jennifer Gold, Jordana Goldlist, Megan Keenberg, Yadesha Satheaswaran, France Mahon, Sarah Molyneaux, Richa Sandill, Vivene Salmon, Kim Whaley, Alisia Grenville, Frances Wood, Maggie Wente, Anita Szigeti, Neha Chugh, Christy Allen & Nancy Houle, Suzie Seo, Kim Gale, Alexi Wood, Melissa McBain, Erin Best, Gillian Hnatiw, Melanie Sharman Rowand, Meg Chinelo Egbunonu, Lisa Jean Helps, Nathalie Godbout Q.C., Laurie Livingstone, Renatta Austin, Janis Criger, May Cheng, Nicole Chrolavicius, Charlene Theodore, Dyanoosh Youssefi, Shannon Salter, Bindu Cudjoe, Elliot Spears, Jessica Prince, Anu K. Sandhu, Claire Hatcher, Esi Codjoe, Kate Dewhirst, Jennifer Taylor, Rebecca Durcan, Atrisha Lewis, Vandana Sood, Kathryn Manning, Kim Hawkins, Kyla Lee, and Eva Chan.  I know it’s not quite over yet, but I am happy to shuffle 2020 out the door…it is no longer welcomed around here. I don’t have to remind all of you about the crappy stuff that has happened to the world this year.
Nevertheless, while 2020 didn't turn out the way I planned, there were a few good things that came out of this year: I perfected my bread making skills and my butter tart recipe (no to raisins, yes to a splash of maple syrup). I’ve spent ten months in jeans & t-shirts (my beautiful fancy shoes are gathering dust on a shelf). It only took a pandemic for the Ontario court system to realize the fax machine should be permanently retired from duty. My blog's readership increased in 2020 and I brought back my Women Leading in Law blog series. ….and it’s Clawbies (Canadian Law Blog Awards) time again! Every year I write a post summarizing my Top Ten articles for that year and I am always pleasantly surprised when I check my Google Analytics to see which ones are the most popular with my readers. Below is a list of my 10 most-read blog posts in 2020 (some written in previous years), followed by my #Clawbies2020 nominations: 10. Book Review: Full Disclosure by Beverley McLachlin (2018). This book was published in 2018 by the former Chief Justice of the Supreme Court of Canada and this post is my review of the murder mystery set in British Columbia. 9. Women Leading in Law: Frances Mahon (2020). This post was one of several posts in my Women Leading in Law blog series that I revived in March 2020. 8. As a Lawyer, When Would You (or Should You) Report Another Lawyer for Professional Misconduct (2014). An oldie but a goodie. This post often appears on my top ten list. (I’m not sure what this says about our profession….) 7. “Thank You for Telling Me My Work Sucks” Why Negative Feedback Can be a Good Thing (2020). This very recent post is on how to handle receiving feedback at work. I am happy to see it made it to the Top 10 so soon. 6. Women Leading in Law: Richa Sandill (2020). Another great entry in my Women Leading in Law series. 5. Barristers Robes: The Courtroom Equalizer (2017). An older post about the positive side to everyone wearing the same uniform in court. One thing I regret leaving out of the post is the fact that it is definitely not an equalizer when litigators are appearing against self-represented litigants. 4. What Are a Lawyer’s Professional Obligations When Leaving a Firm? (2015). Another post that remains popular with lawyers over the years. It’s an important question to address if you are thinking of switching firms or starting your own practice. 3. Plain Language Please. ‘Tis Time to Say Goodbye to Legalese (2015). I am quite surprised this post popped up in the Top 10 this year as it has never made it on to this list before. Perhaps more lawyers are thinking of using plain language? I hope so. 2. Women Leading in Law: Anita Szigeti (2020). Anita’s profile talks about her interesting legal practice in mental health law. And my most read blog post for 2020……. 1. My Career Conundrum: I’m a Litigator and I Hate Conflict (2020). Wow! This post generated so much feedback and prompted dozens of lawyers to reach out to me by email, Twitter, LinkedIn, etc. This post definitely struck a nerve in the legal profession. Now for my #Clawbies2020 nominations:
So that’s a wrap on 2020! All the best in 2021!  I recently moved houses. (Yes, we are those “COVID made me move” people.)
While I was packing up over a decade’s worth of ‘stuff’, I found a performance review from my third year of practice shoved in the bottom of an old banker’s box. Reading the comments made me think about how much I have grown as a lawyer, especially when it comes to receiving negative feedback. For some context, the following are direct quotes from reviews from the partners I worked with that year (edited for confidentiality) discussing my written advocacy skills: “Erin’s written work product was clear, direct, and concise.” “Very solid writing skills. Precise and clear.” “Erin has very strong drafting skills. Her writing is point first and persuasive.” “Erin consistently produces first rate written work product. It is clear, user friendly and responsive to the issues it is intended to address.” “I did not think Erin’s written work was at the expected level. I was disappointed with the draft facta (sic) in the ‘XYZ’ matter and they required substantial re-working.” I didn’t remember the first four reviews, but that final one has stuck with me for 12 years. Especially the word “disappointed”. As a recovering people pleaser, I hate disappointing anyone, especially someone who is relying on me to do a good job. I also remember my reaction when I first read that review. I remember avoiding the partner in the halls. I was angry. I was hurt. I thought it was unfair. I was in a bad mood. It didn’t matter that the rest of my review was glowing. That final comment was the only one that counted. It took me a long time to learn how to handle this type of feedback and criticism of my work. It took me even longer to realize that negative feedback can be a good thing. Over the years I have relied on a few tips that have helped me when receiving negative feedback. These tips work for lawyers of all ages and stages because as we progress in our career, partners may no longer be critiquing our work, but management, opposing counsel, judges, and our clients are: 1. Don’t rush to respond. Take a breather. Our first instinct will be to be defensive. I remember wanting to explain to the partner why his criticism was unwarranted, why I decided to draft the documents the way I did, why he was wrong. I felt the need to explain away the criticism. Folks, this is not helpful. It wasn’t until I was on the other end of providing feedback that I truly understood how unproductive this defensive behaviour can be. I remember one articling student. Whenever I politely provided feedback or suggestions on how to improve his work, he immediately pushed back with an excuse: “Well so-and-so does it this way” or “You should have told me you wanted it done this way” or “I’m only an articling student”. I was trying to mentor him and help him improve his legal practice, but he wanted none of it. He never listened to the specific feedback; instead, because he did not hear the glowing review he expected, he pushed back. Eventually I just stopped working with him. When a more senior lawyer, or a client, gives you negative feedback, fight the urge to speak. You will be defensive. We are only human. Take a breather. Maybe ask for time to respond if you need to. And listen. Truly listen to what they are saying. Try to understand the root of the criticism. Is it a fact (you missed a deadline)? Or an opinion (I don’t like how you wrote this)? If it’s a fact, immediately own up to the mistake or accept the criticism. If it is an opinion, see the next tip. 2. Ask questions to understand the feedback. If the feedback is not a fact, but an opinion, ask questions to understand. If we do not understand the negative feedback, we cannot act on it. What parts of the Statement of Claim need improvement? How could it be improved? What parts of the document did they like? etc. 3. Don’t avoid the person or hold a grudge: You are only hurting yourself. Yes, it is uncomfortable knowing that someone didn’t like your work. But if you avoid that partner or client, you are only hurting yourself. You will be missing out not only on opportunities to work with, and learn from, that person again, but you will also miss out on showing that you listened to their feedback and used it to improve. 4. Remember that not all criticism may be warranted. Sometimes the criticism is unwarranted. Consider where the criticism is coming from. Did your work product really fall below expected standards or does this partner always rewrite everyone’s work, no matter what? Does ego play a part? Or more importantly, is the criticism directed at you because of your gender, race or sexual orientation? This is why asking questions is so important. By digging into the criticism, it will be easier to see the intent behind it. 5. Understand the Positive Side to Receiving Negative Feedback Remember that proper feedback comes from an intent to help. That partner or client wants to let you know what went wrong so you won’t do it again. Often, we don’t see our own shortcomings. Be grateful that someone has taken the time to provide that feedback to you and that you now have an opportunity to be an even better lawyer than you already are. So, back to my negative review. Why did that partner write that comment? Maybe I wrote some crappy factums. Maybe I was working several long hours, for several days and I was too tired to produce stellar work. Maybe I forgot to use active voice. Maybe I missed some case law. Maybe the partner had a particular way he liked factums to be written and I failed to follow his preference. Or, maybe I just suck at writing. But I will never know. Instead of asking questions to understand the feedback better and to learn how to improve my legal writing, I ignored the partner. I missed an opportunity. Don’t be me. |
 
  Erin C. Cowling is a former freelance lawyer, entrepreneur, business and career consultant, speaker, writer and CEO and Founder of Flex Legal Network Inc., a network of freelance lawyers.
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